Welcome! Introduce yourself here 🙂

[Shadow77]

I think mb I just need to get in touch with the local mental health unit. Made it through the worst part without anyone. Few scars but otherwise ok. 

I have a 5 page document that I did that puts different behaviours of mine into the categories. It is how I always remember being from the time I was a child. There's something in all of them, I guess because I internalise things it's meant no one thought I had issues.

[RiverSeal]

Hey @Shadow77 

Thank you for your post on the Forums!

Sounds like you have been through a tough time and made it this far and it might be time for you to reach out and get some help. We all can need a little extra support at times and it can be a big step to ask for help. So I think that you are brave and courageous to post about it here on the Forums with the community of peers.

It can be really good for you and your treatment when you provide details about your experiences with MH. It's great that you have kept a record of your behaviors and remember them from when you were a child. I'm sure that will be well received and help a local MH unit understand you better!

Thanks again for posting on the Forums!

Take care

RiverSeal

[Shadow77]

Thanks @RiverSeal. Growing up in small town Qld wasn't easy. Especially in the 80's and 90's as there was no help for anyone with mental health issues to speak of. It was more or less a taboo topic. 

Unfortunately I have found that even though my ex suffers from depression and anxiety, her willingness to try and understand the fact that what happened during the dissociative episode I barely remember and didn't have control over is lacking. Just to be clear, nothing happened to either of us during that time. I was very subdued and only tried to harm myself. She just doesn't understand. That was the lowest point. Once I can identify that it all comes back to one thing I will feel better because it is something I can work out how to deal with. It's just getting to that point because it needs to be a professional 

[RiverSeal]

@Shadow77 I get what you would have gone through living in a small town in QLD and I did the same in the NT. Not much of anything let alone help for MH health issues at that time.

We don't often get the understanding and support from others including our families or those closest to us. Sometimes we have to have to let it go or accept what we get from others if we want them in our lives which can be challenging. We can only control things in our lives like how we react to others or how we let things affect us not change other people.

Reaching out to professional support can be a lot easier in terms of our experiences being understood and getting the support we need. Often we can have better conversations as professionals to know what and how to say things to support us in most cases.

SANE has Counsellors who you can talk to and get some support if you feel it would benefit you. Here's the details if you don't have them already and want to check it out:

• SANE Support Centre: 1800 187 263 Counselling

Take care

RiverSeal

[Shadow77]

I grew up an only child of a parent who was an only child, my father left when I was under a year, came back around 7 and I haven't seen him since I was 8. Mum's favourite punishment for me was the silent treatment, occasionally if I really pissed her off with something (I was actually a very well behaved kid) she threatened to send me to live with him in NSW. 

[raph]

Hi, my name is Raph and two fun facts about myself are that I love the teenage mutant ninja turtles and that I am a literature nerd! 😄

I joined this forum because I wanted to talk to people who have similar experiences. I recently got diagnosed with OCD and none of my friends irl get it. I personally find it really challenging to talk about in person because of how mortifying it is to talk about intrusive thoughts, so hopefully this will help! 🙂

[tyme]

Hey @raph ,

Welcome to the forums! 

I battled with OCD as a child. It was certainly a very anxious time and really affected me as a child.

I'm so glad things got better for me though. 

There's nothing worse than people not understanding how intrusive and real those thoughts are. I hear you. Do you have any supports to help you through these thoughts?

[David76]

Just that it takes courage to share how your mind is letting you down. That's the first step to recovery.

[Mishmash1]

Hello. I've struggled throughout life with multiple traumas (domestic and family violence) where medical specialists said I had a list of mental health illnesses, which I didn't, and I underwentterrible treatment. The last few years have been health related traumas. After recent sexual assault, I was finally diagnosed with PTSD by a psychologist and last week as Complex-PTSD by a psychiatrist. I feel it's hopeless to try and get better now I'm in my 50s and understandably don't trust medical professionals. I'm hope you may give me peer support and guidance to convince me not to give up 😞

[Shadow77]

It's not hopeless. I'm 46 and just starting too. After years of wondering why I was like I was I'm finally getting some answers, because I didn't fit the typical version of symptoms. I found a possibility on my own and am finding people who deal with it. It's cost a lot, not money but jobs, relationships, friendships, happiness etc. Don't give up, it might be a long road but you've taken the first step, just as I did only a few weeks ago.