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Looking after ourselves

wellwellwellnez
Community Guide

What i fink

I am not my shame. I am, a ,me. Shame is one of my learning mechanisms. Just in case anyone wanted to know. Carry on.

4 REPLIES 4
chibam
Senior Contributor

Re: What i fink

Shame's a hard one. In these increasingly devided times, everyone has starkly differant views on what's right and what's wrong. Hence we are getting further and further away from any sort of consensus on what is truly shameful, and what is okay. So it's virtually impossible to know how we truly ought to feel.

 

Sorry, @wellwellwellnez , I have no answers. Only confusion. But I guess what I'm trying to say is that the bright side is that there's probably places, communities, schools of thought, ect. where you shame isn't a shame at all and you don't have to bear it - if that makes sense?

Re: What i fink

That's an awesome observation @chibam . Shame is personal and inter-personal at the same time. It makes it a mysterious creature. I feel pretty "psycho-educated" on shame's values and in a pretty good place with how I'm relating to it.

 

The trick is taking some pride in shame but not so much as to be ..... a shame. It's a bit a needle to thread and success is best measured on spectrum/tangents than on binaries. There comes a point where shame stops being "shame" and starts feeling more like "autonomy" and "reflection" and a "desire to attribute meaning".

Re: What i fink

re: "there's probably places, communities, schools of thought, ect. where you shame isn't a shame"

 

I think there are such places @chibam . I think you and me just made one. I'm also thinking "this is OUR MADHOUSE NOW" from a recovery community perspective. I really appreciate the riff. Helps me clock my numerous blind-spots.

Re: What i fink

@wellwellwellnez Love your thoughtfulness and playfulness with language.

I fink its best not get in a funk about shame, for all the reasons @chibam said.

Coooeeee

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